Today I did the to-school drop off without taking Gleek along. Taking Gleek adds at least 5 minutes to the beginning of the trip because she has to walk to the car by herself. Adjust her seat by herself. Buckle the seat belt by herself. And then frequently tantrums so that I’ll run back inside to get forgotten items like shoes and blankets. She adds another few minutes to the end of the trip because I have to unbuckle her and coax her out of the car and back into the house. In all, taking Gleek along just about quadruples the nuisance factor, so today I insisted that she stay home with Daddy.
Apparently there was screaming and hitting. Then she ran out of the house and down to the corner where she sat to wait for me. We had heavy frost this morning, she was wearing a sleevless dress and bare feet. Howard followed her to keep her safe, when I rounded the corner and drove past she ran back home. She grabbed onto me and held on like she never intended to let go.
We talked over the experience at length. She informed me that this is the second time I’ve left her. I only vaguely remember the other time, it was at least 6 months ago, probably longer. But in her mind these experiences loom very large and make her very, very sad. The size of her sadness is such that it totally outweighs the nuisance of hauling her along. I don’t want to make her feel that sad or abandoned anytime soon.
Slight Weaning
Just to let you know, you might want to try some slight weaning of having her spend time away from you. I vagually remember the first time my brother and I were left with my aunt because there had been a family emergency. He cried threw tantrums, etc. Or at least let her know that sometimes mommy needs to leave.
However if she is just upset that she doesnt get to go to school, or shopping, or etc with mommy, then I’d say enjoy these years of bonding.
Re: Slight Weaning
Thats the funny thing. She stays quite happily with babysitters. She runs off to the nursery at church without a backward glance. She’ll go with Daddy on errands leaving me behind. Basically any other situation being left is not an issue, but for some reason the daily school drop-off is very important to her.
Re: Slight Weaning
Why? Is it something about not letting Kiki and Link have you to themselves in the car? “Even if Mommy’s driving you she is still paying attention to ME!” Any luck using this incident to perhaps reduce the nuisance factor?
Hey, maybe she’ll be looking forward to going to school when the time comes! (we can only hope)