Back in April I wrote about Kiki and Gleek. (Here: http://www.livejournal.com/users/sandratayler/2005/04/10/)
The measures did a really good job of improving their relationship. Things were better for almost two months. Then school got out and I stopped working so hard at helping them like each other. Gradually incidents and resentments have piled up until yesterday when I realized that I really need to be paying attention to this again.
The measure that worked best last time around was #3, requiring Kiki to write down 50 things she likes about Gleek. She just has to come up with one thing per day until she has 50. If she can come up with more, great, but she has to find at least one thing. This means that Kiki has to pay attention to the positive aspects of Gleek’s personality. I re-instituted this requirement. I’ll also work some with all the other measures that I listed, particularly making sure that Kiki gets Gleek-free time.
In addition to the things I did last time around I’ve realized that I need to change the way I talk about Gleek to Kiki. Instead of saying “I have trouble with her too.” I need to say “I love it when Gleek…” Thinking positively about people always improves relationships.
School starts in just over two weeks. That is going to shift life around here significantly and I think I can make sure that the shifts are positive. At least I hope to.