Link soars
Today was Link’s first day on medication at school. I informed the teacher ahead of time and asked her to watch for any differences. After school was over she called me to tell me how amazed she was. Link did every assignment as fast or faster than any of the other kids. In math he even asked for more work to do. A different teacher even commented that Link seemed really happy today. And Link talked. It was contained to appropriate talking times, but during those times he chattered. I observed the same thing over the weekend. Link is now talking two to four times as much as he did before. It’s like the dam which was blocking the flow of his ideas has burst and now they can flow out in words. Or perhaps it is like a prisoner who has been set free. He was trapped in his own mind, overwhelmed by the simplest of tasks. Today he had an upset here at home and in order to resolve it I had to use tactics that I’m more used to using on Kiki. I didn’t have to talk slow or repeat myself to make sure he understood me.
These changes in Link are close to miraculous. Via medical intervention he has suddenly become the person we all felt he could be, but wasn’t. And yet I am wary. The shackles are off and he is flying. But he is flying so fast and so high that I’m afraid of a crash. I’m afraid to trust that this new person will stay. What if this new brilliance is a temporary effect and he will have to go back to how he was? I don’t want first hand experience of the Algernon effect. Also everything in life has a cost. This new Link is brilliant, what are we giving up? It is possible that we are only giving up things that we don’t mind losing, but I still need to identify what they are. I need to know the emotional/psychological cost. (The fiscal cost is going to be $90 per month if our insurance doesn’t help cover it.) One cost could be an emotional dependence on the medication. Link loves who he has been these past three days. I still need to make sure that he learns that the medication is only allowing him to access his intelligence, not providing something he otherwise wouldn’t have.
I am afraid, and hopeful, and relieved, and happy. Link in flight is a beautiful thing.