Link does not like loud noises. He never has. This is especially apparent around the Fourth of July which seems to be all about loud noises. As a baby Link would huddle in my lap and I’d cover his ears so that he wouldn’t cry. When he got a little older, he’d watch Daddy light fireworks out one of the windows. He wanted to see, but he didn’t want to hear. Last year we went to the local parade and Link spent much of the time with his hands over his ears because every vehicle honked, every band played, and a cannon boomed. On Tuesday we watched hot air balloons launch and Link was afraid. I realized that it was the sound that was affecting him more than the sights. I pondered this and I pondered our intention to attend the parade again. Then I dug around in the garage for Howard’s shooting headphones. These things are designed to protect ears from the sound of nearby firearms detonations.
As soon as we arrived at the parade I handed the headphones to Link. At first he was confused, but when I explained why I wanted him to wear the headphones, his eyes lit up with joy. He plunked them on his head and didn’t take them off except once when he checked to see how loud things were without them. He was able to sit on the front row and enjoy the entire parade instead of wanting to flee from the cacophanous noises. I also sent the headphones with him to the huge fireworks display. Again he was able to enjoy the show without being overwhelmed by the noise.
The very coolest thing about this event is that it demonstrates to me and to him, that he is not inherently fearful. He is having a physical reaction to loud noises and we’ve been interpreting that reaction as fear. He isn’t afraid at all. That knowledge gives us tremendous power. As he gets older he’ll be able to identify the reactions and label them as something besides fear. He’ll be able to take actions to correct the difficulty without feeling helpless or fearful. For today, I’m glad that a set of red headphones allowed him to enjoy the Independance Day activities.
Hey, if it helps any to tell him, I’m a 25 year old man, who enjoys activities that most people would be afraid of (jumping out of airplanes, hiking alone in the wilderness, etc, etc) and I can’t *stand* loud noises. They, in fact, trigger my fight/flight response. I generally spend the 4th as far from civilization as I can get.
You can get a set of the little in-ear foam rubber ones for dirt cheap, too; they are a lot less conspicuous for when Link becomes chagrined about such things. I think I bought a bottle of 60 for four bucks or some such, and even the nice ones are going to be eight for $3 or so. Bargain if they reduce stress 🙂
This might sound odd, but…have you thought of having a doctor examine him for the issues with loud noises? It might be a physiological issue more than a dislike of loud noises. I’ve a friend who’s ear canals are a tad screwy, so loud noises to him actually hurt.
This is an interesting idea, but my instinct is that this not the case for Link. If the noises were causing him pain I would expect distress and ear covering. What happens is that he is instantly fearful and can’t explain why. If pressed, he’ll come up with a vaguely plausible explanation for his fear, but it doesn’t match reality very closely. Link’s reactions match what is described above, where loud noises trigger the fight/flight reflex.
Thanks for the suggestion though. I’ll keep an eye out for more evidence.
This sounds like Link. The loud noises get a visceral reaction from him which bypasses logic.
This is exactly what my little Saia was doing yesterday. He does it when a movie comes on and the sound is up too loud, or during close thunderstorms, or even for a while when I use my blow dryer. He is instantly climbing the nearest person, trying to huddle and cover his ears. Yesterday it took a lot of time and gentle cajoling to get him to go outside with me, but when we were inside, he would sit glued to the window exclaiming constantly his wonder at the fireworks and how much he loved them.
Yep, that seems right
Hi.
The ear covering reaction seems to describe me, but I think loud noises also annoy me. To me, loud electronic music feels like the sound equivalent of looking into a strobe light. A bright strobe light.
So I try to “treat” myself with the equivalent of sunglasses. There are little spongy like earbuds which block out a lot of sounds. Another thing is just get people to be a bit quieter (I’ve asked people to turn the music down, or even moved to another room while still effectively listening to the music they were).
The nice thing about the sponge ones (unlike the silicon ones, at least for me) is that they feel more comfortable.
The nice thing about both is that unlike ear mufflers, you can always keep a few in your purse.
The only problem I can see is Link’s age. I seem to recall you’re not supposed to use sponge/silicon ones until you’re a bit older, but I might be wrong.
Yours,
Uri David Akavia
<3
What a great idea! My son is also very noise sensitive, and so we usually just take him inside during fireworks time, otherwise he gets terrified. We’ll have to try this on Pioneer Day.