I’m on day 3 of a new year. There are things I’m trying to do different, better. Last year was full of business, and schlock books, and writing. It had very little household or financial management. We weren’t complete spendthrifts, but our financial situation this January is not as good as it was last January. I spent a lot of energy last year trying to help bring in more money. But that left no one paying attention to making the money we have last longer. We’re not in financial trouble, but next year I want to look back and see our debt measurably reduced. I want to look at our house and see repairs rather than damages. I want to look at the kids and know that I’ve really done right by them.
It is daunting how many things I must help my children learn. Piles of stuff is covered in school. But I undermine that if I’m too distracted or stressed to make the kids do their homework. And what of all the things that are not covered in school? Simple hygiene for instance. Somehow my kids have not managed to learn how to flush toilets with any regularity. When they do flush, they often clog the toilet with enormous wads of toilet paper. And then there other things like bathing regularly, brushing teeth, changing underwear, picking up toys, washing hands, clearing food from the table, wiping up what you spilled. My kids consider all of these things as optional. Someone has to explain to them why these things are important. Someone has to be paying enough attention to require them to come back and do it right. Someone has to sit with them at dinner and teach by example how to hold a polite dinner conversation. Someone has to fix regular meals and require them to eat so that they have a clue what healthy eating habits look like. Someone has to make them go to bed even though they don’t want to.
Howard and I both feel like we need to be more focused on these things. We also need to be more focused on taking care of our own health. We’ve done lots of pondering and talking to figure out how to restructure our days to make it work. Howard is shifting around his work schedule to make space for designated family times. I am too. We have a plan and we think it will work. Only time will tell.
Unfortunately in this schedule shifting I have to curtail my attendance at writer’s group. I might be able to make an occasional meeting, but I can’t go weekly anymore. This makes me very sad, but it doesn’t change my decision because I believe the decision is the right one. Fortunately the group seems willing to let me be an absentee member and give responses by email. This is in no way the same. I’ll miss out on all the laughter and off-topic conversations. I’ll miss out on the camaraderie. I’ll miss hearing the stories about how everyone’s lives are going. I’ll miss the way that one idea sparks a different one as part of a lively discussion. But at least I’ll still get to read the submissions and maybe come summertime I’ll be able to shift the schedule in a way that makes room for me to go more often. Maybe by then I’ll have all this other stuff under better control.
I’ve already gotten started on the new focus. I sat down yesterday and made a meal plan for the entire month. This increases the likelyhood of me cooking dinner by 90% or so. Without a plan I spend an hour staring at the cupboards hoping that inspiration will strike and then deciding that maybe cereal is an acceptable dinner food after all. The meal plan also lets me shop ahead for the groceries we’ll need. In theory this lets me buy when things are on sale so we spend less. It also means I’m buying more ingredients rather than convenience foods, which is also cheaper. Next month I’ll just use the same meal plan with only a few tweaks representing the success or failure of attempted meals. It’s a start anyway.