Month: March 2008

When attending a convention, or just after a convention, there is a tendency for bloggers to put up a long list of names of people they talked to, or events they went to. There is an urgency about these posts, as if the writer needs to get it all down before the information leaks out of her brain. Posts like that are little reminder tags to the person who experienced the convention. The mention of a name triggers the memory of a conversation and an enjoyable dinner. The listing of a nick name reminds the author of the whole series of interconnected events that led to the bestowal of the nick name. The reference to an event refreshes the memory of people seen and met. This is necessary because it is truly impossible to capture everything that happens at a convention without expanding into novel-length exposition. There are so many new people and new thoughts that the experience is overwhelming, and invigorating, and sometimes frightening.

Last night I went up to my room to drop off my bag. I intended to head back out with Howard to roam the room parties. The hotel room door closed behind me and I was alone. For the first time all day, my brain had time to assimilate rather than collecting new input. I realized that my inner introvert was huddled up in the corner of my brain and I needed to spend some time soothing her to prevent a major screaming fit the following day. I have to pace myself to last through the three days of convention. I crawled into bed, wishing it was my own bed, and wishing for my kids. This is part of the convention experience for me.

Another part of the convention experience is sitting on a panel with other intelligent people and comparing experiences about the panel topic. The blogging panel was like that. Most people hate public speaking, but I love it. I love seeing the audience nod at what I say. I’m thrilled to think that my thoughts, my words, are useful to others. This is the same reason I blog, because there is a possibility that my words will be exactly what someone else needs today; the possibility that my thoughts will make someone else’s life better. That reward is worth the risk of putting myself forward or having some troll throw nastiness at me. It is scary blogging. It is scary being on panels. It is scary being here. But if I am not here I lose out on the opportunity to meet and to greet. I miss out on the chance to learn things that make my life better. I miss out on the chance to say something that will help someone else. So I am here, at the convention, blogging online, because the rewards are more that worth the risks.

Jim Hines of the Jig the Goblin trilogy wrote a post today in which he rants about writing “Experts”. Jim’s major complaint is people who take their small experiences with either writing or publishing and extrapolate it into a supposed expertise about the whole industry. Many of Jim’s points single out self published authors. I found myself both agreeing with him and feeling a little defensive at the same time. Withing the next few months I will be releasing a self published book and therefore I’m at risk of annoying people in the same ways that Jim was annoyed.

I think it takes a special sort of arrogance to become a self published author. I look at the traditional publishing paths and I know that the reason they are traditional is that they work. The publishing “rules” are there because they are truly the best way for people to combine forces and create books. It has to be some sort of hubris for me to see those rules, understand why they exist, and still decide that somehow they don’t apply to me.

The one area where I know I will not annoy Jim and other published authors is that I have no intention of advocating self publishing as the wave of the future. It is a hard, lonely, scary path and I would never recommend it lightly. There are no easy paths to publication, but for most people the best choice is to find a publishing house. There have been many times during the Hold on to Your Horses project when I have curled into a little ball of despair because the project was broken and I did not have the expertise to fix it myself. Then I had to go begging among my contacts for help. The only reason it has a chance of working is because of the amazing people I’ve come to know during the past few years. The only reason I am an exception to the rule is because I can piggy back on all the marketing and friendships from Schlock Mercenary.

One thing that may contribute to the “expert” syndrome that Jim noted, is the reactions of non-publishing people to a self published work. When I talk to neighbors about my forthcoming book and I say “I’m self publishing” I get even more respect and approval than I did for just publishing. This baffles me a little because I know that self published works nearly always suffer from quality issues. But America prizes its innovators and trail blazers. Self publishing seems more accessible. People look at my self published project and think that maybe they could do something towards their own dreams. I’m glad of that and I do feel that there is value in self published works, even the ones with quality issues. Perhaps it is to these other newbies that the “experts” are speaking. I don’t think anyone who wants to be a professional in the publishing industry is going to be led astray by newbie experts.

I guess in the end I believe that the path you take should be the one best suited to your goals. Hubris or not, I do believe that this alternate path is going to work for me. I am going to be able to accomplish what I set out to do: create the book that my daughter needed, reward the artist who helped me, and not lose money while doing it.