Month: March 2008

I finally figured out why Kiki spends so much time scolding and picking at Gleek. I knew that Kiki loves Gleek and so the constant stream of negativity was incredibly frustrating. Kiki was observing Gleek’s current behaviors and extrapolating them unchanged into the future. Kiki could just visualize the disasters ahead for Gleek in that scenario and so felt compelled to hound Gleek into making changes. Gleek, whose behaviors are typical of a seven year old, naturally rebelled at the efforts to make her react as if she were 13.

Today I found a quiet moment to talk to Kiki about what she is doing. I explained that she is right, that if the behaviors continue forever Gleek has a rocky road ahead. Then I also explained that these behaviors will not remain unchanged because Gleek will grow and learn. The example we used was cleaning up a bedroom. This was today’s task and Kiki was picking at Gleek for not working hard enough. I told Kiki stories about herself at that same age and explained a little about the brain development that is necessary to handle such a complex task solo. We then talked about the futility of trying to get a seven year old to behave and react as if she were twice her age.

As we talked I could see an inner tension uncoiling inside Kiki. I’d put my finger right on the trouble. Kiki loves Gleek and wants to save her from disaster. Kiki is very relieved to learn that she does not have to be quite so vigilant. I am hopeful of less squabbling.

Patches turned five yesterday. It always amazes me how my kids can be so big and so little at the same time. I look at him and he is so much smarter and more capable than he was only months ago. He’s grown taller, lankier. The last vestiges of toddlerhood have disappeared. And yet he still curls up so small in my lap when he is sad. Among his birthday gifts were items representing both his future and a connection with the baby he once was.

Patches got a lego set with all the pieces to create an articulated spider. Patches opened the box and set up on the kitchen table. With the booklet in front of him, he carefully sorted through pieces and put them together. Lego instructions are all visual and he was fully capable of using them. It took him 90 minutes, but he put that 193 piece spider together all by himself. When he was done, he came to me with a smile on his face. The spider was in his hands. He showed me how the legs moved. He told me that it was a nice spider and had the spider give my arm a hug to demonstrate. Best of all was the confidence in Patches eyes as he looked at he complicated thing he had done all by himself.

Patches also got a great big stuffed puppy. The thing is three quarters as big as he is. I bought him the stuffed animal because he is continually begging for someone to cuddle him in bed at night. Hopefully the giant puppy (already names Ruffy) will qualify as “someone.” It is also possible that I’ve doomed myself to having a giant stuffed dog in bed with me along with my not-so-grown-up-at-night 5 year old boy.

This morning I turned my calendar over to March and realized that I have arrived in the first month of this year which contains two conventions. The first is a fairly normal event. I help Howard get ready, then he goes. The second is quite different. The second is Ad Astra and I get to go too. I’m excited to go. I’m going to have fun. I am also realizing that there are piles of things I need to do to prepare for leaving the kids behind. My parents are going to come stay with the kids. I want it to be a good experience for everyone, so I’m going to lighten the burden as much as possible. I’ll pre-plan meals and prep them so that preparation is simple. I’ll create a schedule book that my parents can reference. I’ll collect a pile of activities and crafts to smooth over those inevitable sad or bored moments. My brain has begun to run on the things that could go wrong and possible preventions or solutions. This is all normal, but I need to not work myself into a state of stress over it. The truth is that all the preparation is for my own comfort. My parents are fully competent and the kids would survive just fine. Mostly I’m thinking about all of this today because I have the time. Tomorrow I’ll be back working on business stuff and my brain will be too occupied to fret.

This coming week is a shipping week. On Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday I’ll be organizing the invoices and printing labels to simplify the packaging process. Thursday and Friday will be the actual packing and mailing. We’ve got about 400 packages to do. And of course there is the ever-looming layout work for Teraport Wars. Not to mention the correction work on Hold Horses. It is going to be a busy week.

I watched the final episode of Doctor Who Season 2. Please do not post comments that will spoil future seasons.
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