Day: August 9, 2008

I have not read blogs or comments since my first day in Denver. In fact, I’ve hardly had time to sit at the computer. Most of these blogs are being hand written in a notebook during quiet spaces at the booth and being typed in later. (You know you’re really a blogger when you hand write blog entries.) I had to stop reading stuff on the internet. The convention is providing so much food for thought that I’m having trouble processing it all. Adding information from blogs to my brain would result in a total overload. I wouldn’t be able to retain it all. Fortunately blogs are patient. They will wait for my brain to be quiet again.

I haven’t been calling the kids daily. I did on the first couple of days, but they were having too much fun to come talk to me. After that, the quiet spaces in my day were either before the kid got up or after they’d gone to bed. In some ways that was easier on all of us. today I finally got the meltdown phone call. Gleek was crying that she just wanted to go home and have me there. I spent 20 minutes on the phone talking with her, being sympathetic. After she wound down a little bit, she told me that my aunt, who raises pigeons, wouldn’t let her keep an egg. Then Gleek lay out plans for building a cage around our spruce tree so that the pigeons could build nests and raise babies. Then we could make scrambled eggs with the extra eggs. After detailing her plans, Gleek was happy again and tripped off to watch a movie. It took me a little longer to pull myself back together. I’ll be glad to get home too.

People keep asking me why I don’t just bring the kids with me to the convention. I know I could. There is on site child care. The kids would love to come. I’m fully capable of managing the logistics. The primary reason I don’t is that I get stressed by having to wear multiple hats simultaneously. I can’t be full-on business woman if I have kids nearby. I end up fractured, feeling like time spent on the kids is wasted for business and time spent on the business feels stolen from the kids.

We intended to go to three parties. We found enough people to talk to that we only made it to two. The Tor party was afflicted with a horrible smell. This was not the fault of Tor or anyone at the party. The entire room smelled like someone had murdered broccoli and left the body to decay. We did not stay long. Instead we camped at the SFWA hosted Analog/Asimov’s party. Larry Niven made an appearance there and Howard got the chance to talk to him for awhile. Larry is not a conversationalist in the same way the Phil Folio is, but he was charming and Howard was able to tell a joke that made Larry laugh out loud. I’m so glad we got a chance to meet him and shake his hand.

I love the conversations I have at this convention. I love being able to talk and listen to other adults who are passionate about the same things that I am passionate about. I love the amazing people we meet. And I can not deny how satisfying it is to watch some people, who looked right past us on the first day, now focus on us with respect for what we’ve accomplished. Howard is not a big fish in this ocean, but he is not a guppy either. That is nice. My position is mostly secured by being Howard’s right hand. But last night I got the chance to talk about my projects and accomplishments that are separate from Howard’s. That was a nice ego boost.

It was past midnight when we returned to our room. I didn’t want to leave the party. It was still in full swing and I was having fun. But I knew that if I did not get sleep today would be miserable. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to settle into sleep, but I crashed quickly once I lay down. In the few quiet minutes before sleep claimed me, I reviewed conversations and events. This has been a marvelous trip. I’ve many many new friends that I’ll need to follow up with after the con is over. But no matter how wonderful all of this is, I’m starting to feel ready to go home. This is beautiful and glorious, but it is not my life. I don’t want to stay here forever. I will enjoy today and tomorrow as much as I can, but I will be glad to get back home.