Categorizations

Today has been a thought filled one. I found myself musing on my trip to South Africa in the fall of 1999. It was only 9 years after the official end of apartheid. Only 5 years after the first election in which all races were allowed to vote for their leadership. Most of the adults I met could clearly remember what it was like to live under the apartheid laws. One man told me having apartheid repealed was like having the lid of the box opened, suddenly so many more things were possible. Unfortunately in 1999 most of those possibilities were as yet unrealized. The poverty and crime rates were both astronomically high. There simply were not enough jobs available for the people who trained for them. I could still see inequities everywhere. White skinned people were by far the minority and yet the professional, high-profile jobs were mostly held by whites.

As part of my trip I visited Gold Reef City, which was essentially a gold mine theme park. On the surface were buildings and shops on the gold mine theme. Dancers performed dances that were often done in gold mining camps. Plaques and information about the history of gold mining abounded. There was even a very unnerving trip down into the mine itself. The part that lingers in my memory today was the gold pouring demonstration, but not for the demonstration itself. What I remember clearly was the man standing by the door of the kiln. His job was to open the door and stand in the blasting heat while using long tongs to pour gold into a brick mold. Later this gold would be taken back to melt again for the next demonstration. I remember the man because he stared at the audience and radiated anger and resentment. It rolled off him hotter than the furnace he stood beside. I realized that the entire audience was white, while the demonstration crew was black. I thought of all the stories of hatred and violence that I’d been told during my stay. He was obviously not going to do anything there in the brightly lit public space, but it was still frightening.

That moment was the first time I realized that there are people in this world who would kill me just for breathing and belonging to a category of people they have decided to hate. This was deeply disturbing to someone like me who doesn’t desire to offend anyone. I am grateful for that experience. It also forced me to confront the fact that I can not please everyone, nor will they always give me the chance to try. My decisions, my very existence, will engender anger in others. This does not give me license to hide at home where I feel safe. Instead I must walk bravely in the world, making the best decisions I can, hoping that others are doing the same, hoping that others are judging me for what I say and do rather than by a category that they have assigned to me.

Elections are coming up. All the politicians are throwing category labels around like confetti. We have liberals, conservatives, fiscal conservatives, social liberals, green parties, constitution parties, republicans, democrats, pro-life, pro-choice, pro gay marriage, anti gay marriage, environmentalists, and on and on. Everyone seeks to stick labels onto themselves and slap different labels on others. Everywhere is the feeling that “If you’re not for me, you’re against me.” Antagonism is rife and I feel sad because of it. There must be a way to make the world a better place without making enemies of each other.