Link in retrospect

I was setting up our Wii console so that Patches could play a video game when I found the message. It was a little memo that Link wrote for himself. It read “I like Bestfriend.” He wrote similar notes several days running. Link still misses Bestfriend even though they moved away more than a year ago. Looking at that note I thought about the long journey that Link has taken this past year. A year ago this month we chose to medicate Link for ADD. It was a decision we approached with great trepidation. It was, and continues to be the right decision for our family. Link flourishes. He is no longer constantly scolded for things undone. He has more confidence in himself and in his capabilities. He is catching up in so many of the social and emotional arenas where he lagged behind for so long. He is capable of examining his own emotions and working through them. It made me so glad to find this little memos. They are evidence to me that Link is acknowledging his emotions and dealing with them rather than avoiding them as he used to do. This is good.

Now I need to be making more space in my schedule to talk to Link about things. He needs quiet one-on-one conversation just as much as his noisier-pushier siblings do. I need to create quiet times where the two of us can talk. I’d like him to be able to turn to other people with his sadnesses as well as writing notes on a video game console. The more he connects with people here and now, the less he will miss Bestfriend who is gone. Link has grown so much and yet he still seems so much younger than his peers. I need to extend myself more to help bridge that gap.