Where is the story?

This past week Howard and I had the occasion to write a press release. (If anything comes of it, we’ll let you know.) Neither of us was particularly happy about having to write it because we had piles of other work to do. I wrote the first drafts and they just were not working. Finally in frustration I went to Howard. He took my drafts and some suggestions from smart friends and then crafted a solid press release. My version did not work because I was merely making an announcement/sales pitch. Howard’s version also included the announcement, but it also told a story that would interest people enough that they wanted to know more. Howard tried to suggest this when I was writing that first draft. “Find the story.” He told me, but in the end he was the one who found it.

When I want to write a blog entry I have the same challenge. I want to find the story that explains the events of my day, or my week (or my year, or my life.) I want to frame it all in a way that makes sense. I want to make the experiences useful either for enlightenment or amusement. I do this primarily for myself, but it brings me joy to share these stories with others as well. No matter what the story I’m telling, I try to find a positive frame for it. I do this because I believe in the power of storytelling. I believe that the stories we tell ourselves have the power to shape our lives. My friend Janci named her blog “fall seven times; stand up eight” I love that frame. I love the message she is giving to herself and to anyone else who reads her blog. I know that no matter what life throws at her, she is going to be fine, because I’ve seen the frames that she gives to the stories of her life.

Lately I’ve been having trouble finding frames for my blog stories. It certainly isn’t for lack of events, because my days are always full. I think that is exactly the problem. My brain is always full tracking tasks and so there is no space for me to lay my thoughts out and shape them into stories. This is doubly true for fictional stories. Fiction starts small but often grows to take over my whole brain and so I’ve been afraid to let the story seeds sprout. The stress has gone down several notches since the end of March. I feel calmer, more ready to handle the things that are coming. But my brain is likely to be cluttered for some time to come. Adding to the clutter in my brain are all the bits and pieces that I’m holding on to because I know that they are the seeds of good blog entries. They are stories that I want to tell. I need to do a better job of clearing space in my brain and my day so that I can find the right frames for these stories. It is so frustrating to sit staring at a blank screen, sorting through the clutter in my brain, knowing I had stories to tell, but not remembering what they are.

Lately the story I have been telling myself about my life is that I am busy and stressed. This theme runs through nearly every day and many of my blog entries. The story I have not been telling is that I am happy and grateful for the life that I get to live. Both stories are accurate, but the abundance of retellings of the stressed stories make them loom over the happy stories. I had this reversed last November. I was no less busy, but happiness was the theme of the month. I need to put that back. I need to remember the stories that explain why I am so busy and why I am glad to be busy with these things. I need to consciously look for the happy things in my life. I think if I do this, I will never be at a loss for a story to tell.

3 thoughts on “Where is the story?”

  1. The reminder to tell ourselves the happy stories is a good one.

    The “look for the story and tell it” idea is also how my professors have advised us to do scientific articles and presentations. It’s a good principle, and at some point I hope to get to where I’m sure I’ve recognized it. 😉

  2. Just don’t use the happy stories to pretend the stress isn’t there. The healthy story always recognizes the problem, but then finds reasons to be happy despite it. That’s what I think, anyway.

    Thanks for the compliment on the journal title. It’s there to remind me that though I’m still failing at lots of things, that’s just a process I have to go through in order to succeed. That way I can look at each successive “failure” as a mini-success because it gets me one step closer to doing it right. Life is full of practicing, I have discovered. Just when I get good at one thing, I discover I have twenty other things I need to start practicing. A few at a time, I’ll get there eventually, I guess.

  3. “Just don’t use the happy stories to pretend the stress isn’t there. The healthy story always recognizes the problem, but then finds reasons to be happy despite it. That’s what I think, anyway.”

    Excellent point. I couldn’t have put it better myself.

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