Maybe it worked.

Last Saturday I spent all day and all night in the hospital taking care of Gleek. At one point I remember looking around the hospital room and realizing that I wasn’t feeling that “this is a terrible place” vibe that I’ve always had about hospitals. I didn’t want Gleek to be sick and I would have preferred to be someplace else, but the hospital itself was not filling me with angst. I was too busy to pay more than passing notice to this thought.

Today it hit me. Hospitals have not always filled me with dread. They have only done so since since surgery and radiation therapy. Perhaps I didn’t mind the hospital last Saturday because of all the emotional purging I did last January. I opened up and emptied out those reservoirs of feeling and now when the hospital subconsciously reminds me of those events, I have no angst threatening to burst free. All that blogging seems to have done me at least that much good. Maybe I’ve also short circuited the midwinter=bad as well.

It is nice that hospitals can just be places instead of bad places. It is also nice that when I was stressed over Gleek I did not have old emotions lingering close and adding to the unpleasantness of the experience.